Bring, keep, let go
Things I want to start, keep and stop doing, being and having this season - autumn edition
As I age (shall I say like good wine?) I am starting to live more and more in tune with the seasons, something that I seemed to have lost between childhood and my late twenties. As if during this time, life was independent from my surroundings, as if the world around me did not matter or impact me.
That has well and truly changed, I now very much live with and by the seasons. It impacts all aspects of my life. I also stopped rushing into what’s next so much, a reason to fully immerse myself in the now and intentionally choose how I want to live the next 3 months.
As autumn starts I want to live aligned with it, through what I eat, consume, do. I want to follow the rhythm of shorter crispier days, letting go and preparing for the next cycle. I want to embrace cozyness and make the most of all things seasonal. I want to live this present moment fully, and help my body adapt to the changes. I want cinnamon and coffee dates, long walks and a Sunday afternoon by the fireplace. I want to pick apples and eat them warm. Make art in the kitchen and sit in the garden when the sun shines.
I want to start:
Collecting leaves and conkers to make art with my eldest (we already have a truckload of goblets) and celebrate the season
In the same vibe I’d love to make an autumn wreath, home made with things I can gather during my walks
Create an altar, a space for spirituality, maybe in the front porch, to honour that side of me, the witch connected to my soul and to the world. Some place I see every day, that is both beautiful and a reminder to stay in tune with everything around me, seen and unseen.
Organise a « friendsgiving », in the mindset of community. I want us to have people over at least once a month for lunch or dinner - inspired by this article on Substack:
- It can be casual (as now with a tiny baby) or more elaborate (with candles and fancy food). The goal is to sit with people we love and spend some time together. And maybe take this opportunity to ask the (brilliant) questions in this article:
Walk more - and go on my favourite local walks with my baby in the wrap. To help my body regain strenght and enjoy the beauty of the countryside in autumn. With a hot end of pregnancy and PGP my steps are very few and I want to change this.
Draw, paint, create again, in the pockets of time I have, just because it makes me feel complete.
Bake and cook seasonal meals. Now the kitchen isn’t boiling hot as soon as I lift a finger, and I don’t have a huge belly in the way, I am thinking cinnamony compote, this cake:
vegan carbonara (with mushrooms, from the Bosch book), stew (my sister in law makes delicious ones). I picture end of afternoon cooking sessions to enjoy snack and dinners around candles.
Drink (and purchase) rooibos tea. I used to drink it when I lived in Malawi and really love it, so I shall treat myself to a good loose rooibos tea, to be drunk from a tea pot while looking out the window.
Hot chocolate - the one by Sweet Bee, such a cosy ritual I absolutely love.
Going on friends date, baby in tow, but I want to keep seeing my friends. I put it in start again because it took years here to find my people and I want to take care of the relationships I created (on top of the ones I have with my friends all over the world). Whatever shape these dates take: lunch, walk, errands, cup of tea.
Making time for community. I believe one of the reasons I love shows like Gilmore girls or Sweet Magnolias or the Jenny Colgan books so much is because of the community they display. By moving to a village a little over a year ago I found this sense of belonging and I want to foster it, be it by helping out putting up posters for the harvest dinner raising money for the preschool or going to the Thursday morning tea and cake at the community hall.
I want to keep:
Our dinner time candle tradition- it’s been a few weeks of lighting a candle at dinner time and beside signaling to my 4 years old it’s time to sit down and offering a reason to stay put (so she blows the candle) it brings a softness into our evenings.
Reading and re-reading my favourite books. With my last postpartum I stopped reading for a while but it is one of my favourite things to do, so this time I make a point to read at least a few pages at night. New books - currently a Jenny Colgan, it’s a summery one but I love her writing - and old favourite like First frost by Sarah Addison Allen.
Rewatch Stranger things , Gilmore girls, Harry Potter - my Autumn faves.
Shower every night - basic but a treat I do not take for granted with a newborn. It is so essential for my mental health and lovely on a freezing autumn day, maybe add a candle to it and some fancy products to the routine, a luxury moment of lathering in cream, a relaxing scent.
Time for skin care: currently a very simplified one but it works, as days get colder (and sleep is still on and off) it’s essential to moisturise enough that I feel fresh. So I am doubling down on Retinol / vitamin C / hyaluronic acid and a good moisturiser. Simple yet efficient.
My dreams, I won’t let time crush all that I want to do, so I keep going, at a pace that works for me, it is slow but steady.
Writing, I restarted a journal and I have this newsletter, oftentimes I resist spending time on it but it always feels good. Giving myself even 5 minutes to write is always satisfying, and is there anything more cosy than writing, snuggled under a blanket on an autumn day after a long walk? Now I need to add writing my book(s), for which I have been making excuses not to do lately. And this has to go.
Which is the perfect introduction to my last category.
The things I want to let go of.
Let go of - there is no better moment of the year to let go than when leaves are falling. I take this as a new chapter and want to let go of:
My phone - I indulged in more phone time post partum (have you breastfed a baby for 8hs a day?) but although not getting back on Instagram - a year without it almost! I still scroll - yes on substack, and scour vinted like there is no tomorrow. Less of this means more time to be, create, write, think and truly relax.
Fear, at least some, at least sometime, especially when it hinders me from making my life happens
Procrastination - I can justify it, I am postpartum, tired and all, but also there are things I can do, so reconnecting to my energy level and my dreams and letting go of fear should allow for procrastination to go. Yes? Let’s start with not procrastinating to write my book. (Tomorrow?)
Perfection for my home decor. As we are heading towards staying home season I want to make it cosy. Without waiting for perfection. So no more expecting the stairs to be repainted before I start the gallery wall. Pictures are on the way and I can’t wait. No more wanting a spotless house, I want to lean in the chaos. Until I can no more - i have my limits!
Clothes that don’t fit, either my present body or lifestyle. It means boob access and comfortable for my postpartum body. But I also want to feel good so I curated a wardrobe that makes me happy. I’ll come back to this at some point.
What other are doing. On this platform and in life. I want to do me. Find my voice. Be myself fully. So I need to let go of what happens around, yes to inspiration, but no to pure copy. Even if it’s not perfect.
Shedding is part of the cycle, strong roots are needed, hello autumn, let’s have a cosy time.
That is beautiful! We started eating seasonally a few years ago, and it's made a huge difference. I agree that living in tune with the seasons is deeply satisfying. Thank you for sharing your beautiful list.